Dog Poop

by on September 13, 2022
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WHALE (yelling at his dog, who is looking guilty): Noodles! What is this! Did you poop in the dining room?!...NO? Oh boy, that's a lie! I know it was you, you bad dog! There's only two people in this house, and I sure as Christmas didn't leave a big poop in the dining room! NOODLES! Listen to me, you wholesale poopmongering chocolate salesman! Why, I-- (We see that Noodles is only hearing 'blah blah blah Noodles' over and over, despite his look of guilt) WHALE: ...And now there's poop everywhere! NOODLES (thinking to himself): Poop...EVERYwhere? (We now see Noodles pooping on top of a car, on top of a grand piano, on the rink in the middle of an ice hockey game, on Walt Disney's grave, on a savannah near some lions, on top of the Chrysler Building while suspended from a helicopter, and on the back surface of JFK's car with Jackie O in the front seat, surrounded by people holding signs saying 'Noodles for President' and one woman holding her baby aloft, exclaiming: Noodles! Poop on my baby!) NOODLES (thinking to himself, looking magnanimous and still in the room with Whale): ...It would be my very honor to poop on your crown, your Majesty! WHALE: Dammit, Noodles, are you even listening to me, you psychotic 8-cylinder poop engine?!

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